Max is the brains of the outfit (which is pretty sad). He came up with the half-assed idea to sell books out of the F.N. Best T-Shirt Company without his boss's knowledge because Frank Best is a clueless dipshit idiot. Ha, should I actually write that? Wouldn't matter, he's a shithead that doesn't read anything. Wait, are you doing voice to text? No.

Ethan is the heart of the outfit. He is an awe-inspiring writing talent that can evaluate and analyze the highest quality stories we publish here. Having never been published himself (being a misunderstood genius), he is happy to give others the chance. You're saying all that? You sound like a dick? I'll rewrite it later and tone it down a little.

Floyd is the...we aren't sure what Floyd does. He kind of just sits around saying stupid shit. Hey. It's true. Fuck you both, I'm leaving. Bring back some pizza.